I am my own Granpa
Many, many years ago
When I was twenty-three
I got married to a widow
Pretty as could be.
This widow had a grow-up daughter
With flowing hair of red.
My father fell in love with her,
And soon the two were wed.
This made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life.
Now my daughter was my mother,
For she was my father's wife.
To complicate the matters worse,
Although it brought me joy,
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boy.
My little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad.
And so became my uncle,
Though it made me very sad.
For if he was my uncle,
Then that also made him brother
To the widow's grown-up daughter
Who, of course, was my step-mother.
Father's wife then had a son
Who kept them on the run.
And he became my grandson,
For he was my daughter's son.
My wife is now my mother's mother
And it makes me blue.
Because, although she is my wife,
She's my grandma, too.
If my wife is my grandmother,
Then I am her grandchild.
And every time I think of it,
It simply drives me wild. For now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw,
As the husband of my grandmother,
I am my own grandpa!
My Homework
Sometimes my homework is small
Sometimes my homework is long
But whenever i do my homework
My homework is always wrong
Sometimes I do my homework at a slow pace
Sometimes I do my homework in the fast lane
But however I do my homework
my homework is still a pain
Sometimes my homework is easy
Sometimes my homework is hard
But whenever i can't do my homework
I feel like a retard
A Fish I Wish
Oh how I wish I was a fish to swim in the deep blue sea.
I would swim up and down and all around in laps of two or three.
There would be no rules to follow,all fun down here.
On land rules are trouble,a real pain in the rear.
Humans are not wanted down here and for them you must always look.
For they only want to see us fish dangling from their hook.
A sea full of wonder,yes that's the life for me.
Oh how I wish to be a fish and one day soon I'll be!
The Toliet
The toilet is a magical gateway
It's also so comfortable that you'd like to stay
The toilet is attached to an amazing connection and the toilet makes up only a small section
The journey starts at the bottom of the bowl
And it doesn't stop till it reaches it's goal
The occupier hits the handle switching the machine to send
And the waste goes down through the U-bend
Soon the waste gets down to the sewers
Where the water's so bad if you drink it you get tumors
The waste keeps going through that system
Where there's nothing to find that could possibly glisten
Soon the waste gets to the water plant
Where the waste goes through a cleansing chant
Then this new water goes on a new mission
A new cleaner expedition
The chrome clean pipes help this water steer
And you could bet your soul that this water's clear
It has no discolorations and does not stink
And this is the water that comes out your kitchen sink
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